As previously stated in almost all my blogs so far I feel completely lost. I’m 26 with a degree, graduate student, and yet to have a career in my field. Besides feeling lost career-wise, I feel lost in love, identity, and life in general. As part of Generation-Y I hear more about quarter life crisis nowadays than I do actual mid-life crisis. It’s really sad. Even though career amounts to a huge part of the quarter life crisis, I’m just not sure what the heck I want. I know I want to be happy, I know I want to have financial stability, and the freedom to just do me and not be criticized about my decisions. I think I need to get over this last wish because people will criticize you regardless if you receive their approval or not.
I find myself having the most honest thoughts I’ve ever had about life in the past weeks. For myself I would like to have a rewarding life. A life that means something and the things I do are for a purpose whether it’s helping the world, others, or just making myself happy. In helping the world I have starting thinking about progressing into a zero waste life. I have started making those changes in making my own toothpaste and investing in biodegradable tooth brushes. I am also analyzing the amount of trash I produce and what I utilize the most. I will slowly be progressing into buying a water filter and using a reusable stainless steel water bottle to reduce the plastic bottle waste I create. I am slowly using up my products so I can try to make homemade lotions and soaps. I have started buying glass containers and mason jars for storage instead of plastic. I still wear make up and use products with chemicals in them but I am slowly transitioning into wearing less make up and using the products I have. I can happily say that I do not wear make up approximately 4-5 days a week which I also think has been helping my skin and overall self esteem.
In regards to helping myself, I have been trying to listen to my body more. I find myself severely fatigued since October as well as significantly effected by weather changes and allergies. What I will be starting these next few weeks is trying to eat more raw and vegan foods. This week I will be incorporating more fruits, veggies, and healthy fats into my diet until I can actually start my 7 day cleanse involving a raw vegan diet. I will also try to restart a very mild yet consistent physical activity regimen and see if that will help with my fatigue. Mental health is also a priority right now. I have so many honest thoughts that I just want to figure out what I want and what will make me happy. I am making sure I am having adequate rest and writing more of my thoughts. I have also been sharing my ideas with genuine and caring people who will give me their honest opinion in a non judgmental yet realistic manner.
As far as productivity goes I have been so unmotivated lately. I find myself procrastinating more than ever and a bit scatterbrained. What I am hoping to do in the next few weeks is have a productivity planner that will prioritize tasks for each day. I really need to get on top of things when it comes to assignments, finances, and time management. I know this will be a slow process but I am hopeful about the potential outcomes of getting organized.
Lastly, what I can do for others. Right now, I feel like I can’t help others if I can’t help myself. When I do things, I try my best especially if it’s for others. I think I need to start making progress on my own personal changes in order to really help others. The best thing I can do is become the best person I can be so I can create meaningful relationships with those I care about. It is exhausting to have mediocre friendships and just not giving in the best of my abilities. I do find myself having a limited number of close friends that I can give quality time to. At the moment I think it is 3 people. Everyone else I may see once a week or less frequently. For one of my friends I give that intellectual and emotional support. For another friend I provide physical and affection support. For my last friend I provide motivational support and reliability. I am also trying to create a closer bond to my sister by doing things that we can both enjoy and share our ideas.
I think so far I am going in the right direction. I am lost but I know where I want to go, it’s just the paths in between that I need to figure out. I need to figure out how I am going to get there and what I need to do to reach my destination. Overall, I would say I am in a good place and just have proceed with these ideas and tasks. We will see how it goes.